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‘After being married for almost 18 years, and since there was never any rancour between us, we are still very close, as parents of Azad, as colleagues in the film work that we do, and as friends.’
IMAGE: Kiran Rao with Aamir Khan. Photograph: Kind courtesy Kiran Rao/Instagram
In the midst of her Oscar campaign in Los Angeles, Kiran Rao took time out to celebrate her 51st birthday on November 7.
She discusses her special sophomore film, and also the unique relationship she shares with its producer and her former husband Aamir Khan in this conversation with Subhash K Jha: “We still consider each other family and will continue to do so, I’m sure, in the long run.”
Aamir and you are still seen together everywhere, so I am a bit confused about the divorce. Would you care to shed some light on this?
After being married for almost 18 years, and since there was never any rancour between us, we are still very close, as parents of Azad, as colleagues in the film work that we do, and as friends.
We still consider each other family and will continue to do so, I’m sure, in the long run.
He’s my sounding board, and I am his. Our bond is built on trust and shared experiences.
IMAGE: Kiran and Aamir promote Lost Ladies in Los Angeles. Photograph: Kind courtesy Kiran Rao/Instagram
Marriages are falling apart around us. Do you recommend that couples should live in before marrying?
Human relationships are complex, and I believe people (consenting adults) should have the freedom to explore and define their relationships however they choose.
We need to be understanding of each other’s needs, and work towards replacing moral judgement with love and empathy.
You turned a year older on November 7. How did you celebrate your special day?
Honestly, I don’t think I could have asked for a better birthday.
I’m currently in Los Angeles with our film, meeting some incredible talent and advocates for Laapataa Ladies. It’s been heartwarming to see their reactions and the love they have for the film.
A group of friends even threw me a surprise party here in LA, which was so sweet.
Right after that, we jumped straight back into work.
Photograph: Kind courtesy Kiran Rao/Instagram
This birthday was extra special as your film has reached unexpected heights. Are you in an extra-happy space right now?
I couldn’t be happier. This film has truly been the gift that keeps on giving.
When we made it, our dream was simply to share it with as many people as possible and spark conversations about gender parity, equality and womanhood.
To see that happen on a global scale is incredibly special.
As a woman, mother, and film-maker, how do you view your journey so far?
I am filled with gratitude. Motherhood has given me a deeper emotional understanding of my work, helping me tell more honest and empathetic stories.
Being a woman and film-maker in an industry that often isn’t designed for us has pushed me to carve out my own space.
I’m fortunate to have had a wonderful support system and incredible collaborators along the way, and will always be grateful for that.
Every chapter — whether as a film-maker or a mother — has shaped the other, and I’m thankful for the challenges and the joys that have come with them.
IMAGE: With Aamir and their son Azad. Photograph: Kind courtesy Kiran Rao/Instagram
As a female film-maker, are you able to tell the stories you want to, exactly the way you envision them? Did you have to make any compromises in Laapataa Ladies?
I don’t believe any film-maker should ever have to compromise on the story they set out to tell.
I don’t think I could have found better collaborators than Aamir Khan Productions and Jio Studios, who empowered us throughout the entire process.
Aamir was the one who discovered the story, and that alone speaks volumes about the kind of support we received.
IMAGE: With Aamir’s ex-wife Reena Dutta, Ira, Azad and Aamir. Photograph: Kind courtesy Kiran Rao/Instagram
If you had the chance to change anything in your life, would you?
I’ve never really thought about it.
I’m incredibly happy with everything life has offered me.
The journey I’ve been through has brought me to this point, and I wouldn’t change a thing.
If anything, I just wish there were more than 24 hours in a day, so I could do even more of what life has to offer.
