The past doesn’t always stay in the past, and one bride learned this the hard way — all thanks to her younger sister!
Taking to the infamous Am I The A**hole thread on Reddit this week, a 20-year-old woman revealed she possibly “ruined” her 30-year-old sister Emily’s wedding and honeymoon two months ago after she accidentally exposed her “wild” past to her brother-in-law Danny. Yikes! She explained she grew up with Emily and their 27-year-old sister Mary. In fact, they were so close that she knew a lot about their partying ways from a young age — “a lot more than” she was supposed to at the time.
When Mary got married, the social media user was “really close” to her brother-in-law. He even knew about Mary’s “partying, drinking, and pretty much everything else she did” and “never had a problem with any of it.” Danny, on the other hand? It sounds like Emily kept him in the dark about her party days! However, the youngest sister had only met Danny “a handful of times” before the wedding and assumed Emily told him all about her past. Yet, she later found out her assumption was completely wrong! The day before the nuptials, the family were at the rehearsal and started to share “interesting stories” from their childhood:
“Danny asked me how come I’ve never dated, drank or partied. I, not even thinking it might be a big deal, said that after hearing all the stories from my older sisters, never really wanted to or felt the need to.”
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Danny looked at her “a bit confused but said nothing” while Mary “glared” at her. Apparently, the groom had no clue about Emily’s “‘wild days.’” Uh oh! The Redditor said she apologized to her sister, who insisted it “‘wasn’t a big deal.’”
Spoiler alert: It was!
Just this week Emily and Mary confronted their little sister and accused her of “ruining” the wedding and honeymoon as Danny was very mad at the bride for “lying”! The poster said:
“Emily and Danny visited us yesterday. Danny was as nice as ever, while Emily was a bit standoffish. While Danny was out with our dad, Mary and Emily ganged up on me and told me Danny was mad at Emily for lying and that I ruined their wedding and honeymoon. My mom heard us talking, came into the room and chewed out my sisters for blaming me for Emily’s lies.”
While her mom, dad, and even brother insist she is not to blame for the tension between Emily and Danny, the social media user cannot help but wonder now: Is she an “a**hole” for exposing her sister’s past? Well, overwhelmingly, many people agreed she was NOT one in this situation! How was she supposed to know what Emily did or did not say to her partner? Plus, accidents happen! It’s not like she did this on purpose — as far as we know! See the reactions (below):
“How are you supposed to keep with the lies if you don’t know there are lies to keep up with?!?! It’s pretty much common knowledge that wedding rehearsals are time for good natured teasing of the bride and groom. Emily and Mary should have seen this coming and warned you. (And it’s not even like you gave sordid details!) NTA.”
“Of course you are NTA. Trying to shift the anger onto you is what makes your bride sister one and the other one assisting her especially. She should have owned up to her lies as it would most likely have come out in the future anyway (or were they planning to go NC with everyone who knew your sister in her ‘wild phase’?). Her poor husband, learning about your bride-to-be’s probably promiscuous past and being lied to definitely puts a damper on ones wedding celebration and honeymoon. The timing was unfortunate but better before than after the wedding.”
“NTA – you’re definitely not the a-hole in this situation, how would you have known that Emily did not tell your BIL about her past? Additionally, if Emily did not want Danny to find out, she should have warned everyone to keep quiet about it. Your sister should just own up to the consequences of lying to BIL instead of playing the victim and blaming you.”
“NTA. Your sister should have been upfront. If not you, from the other BIL, or someone else from their past. It’s not something she can keep hidden, and since no one told you this was a deep dark secret, how were you to know to keep quiet? I’m glad your family was on your side. Your sisters are ah that owe you an apology.”
Well, it sounds like the Reddit user DID get an apology! In an update, she shared that she had “the talk” with her sister and, long story short, all of this was a misunderstanding! Also, Emily and Danny were the ones to ruin their wedding and honeymoon– not the younger sibling! She explained:
“Turns out my BIL was upset she didn’t tell him everything, but he got over it quickly. He didn’t mention anything for almost 2 months because he thought Emily was upset with herself and the situation, so he didn’t want to make it worse. Now, my sweet idiot sister though something similar, that he was upset with her, so she didn’t want to make the situation worse than it already was. So, basically, the wedding and honeymoon were ‘ruined’ because they had an awful case of worrying about the other one and walking on eggshells around one another. My BIL was never upset with me and my sister wasn’t really upset with me either.”
Before the confrontation this week, Emily grabbed coffee with her friend Lexi and confided in her about her concerns over how distant Danny had been at the time. Well, the pal went straight to the worst case scenario here, told her her hubby was most likely getting ready to leave her, and “that she deserved it”!
Jeez!
Naturally, Emily started to panic and went to Marry “upset.” All of that sparked the massive “disagreement” the trio had. Danny then caught wind of all the drama. That’s when he and Emily finally sat down to hash everything out:
“Later yesterday, they went to my sister’s and Emily started crying while she thought Danny was out. Danny heard her and they finally talked it through. Their conclusion was that they were both idiots.”
All of this drama could have been avoided if Danny and Emily, you know, communicated with each other in the first place! Just saying! But we guess in Emily’s defense she did have a lot going on at the time… She just found out she was pregnant around when her friend Lexi brought up a possible divorce! Plot twist! The younger sibling said:
“The cherry on top was the fact that, about a week before visiting us, Emily found out she was pregnant (pre wedding baby, I was told). So, when she went to my sister crying about a possible divorce, she told her she was pregnant. I guess that’s why Mary took her side.”
Ultimately, Emily and Mary “apologized for attacking me and to the rest of the fam for the stress.” She also apologized to Emily and Danny — though they recognized she was in no way at fault here:
“I apologized to both Emily and Danny for the part I played in this mess and they said what y’all said too, that I can’t lie about something if I don’t know I’m supposed to and that I shouldn’t have been put in that position in the first place. So, as of now, Lexi is out, we’re all fine and I’m getting a nibling next year. And Danny and Emily decided to have a do over honeymoon on their anniversary next year with the BeBe (Moira Rose anyone?).”
Hopefully, Emily and Danny’s do-over honeymoon is drama-free! What are your thoughts on this wild story, Perezcious readers? Did you think the social media user was to blame for the mess? Sound off in the comments below!
[Image via 27 Dresses/20th Century Studios]
